Up north

Martha has a friend, Jason. He turned 25 last week. He lives in a town of 75 people called Isabella, located in the North Woods of this state, less than 100 miles from the Canadian border. Myself and a large group of Martha's friends traveled north on Saturday morning. Snowfall was promised. There is no snow yet in Minneapolis. Plenty of ice and freezing rain though.

Towns get smaller and farther apart as you follow Lake Superior northwards. The temperature drops too, as do property prices. One could acquire a decent enough abode with a few acres of woods for less than $50,000. Sounds great, but what does one do for work? I'm not cut out for the logging or mining game so I'll continue to be tied to the big city for now. If you were a musician or furniture maker or something like that, then an existence in this setting would be quite possible. Nice.

We drove through Duluth, a university town of about 80,000 people. Lots of smoke stacks and heavy industry, namely Taconite mining and processing. Very nicely located on the shores of Lake Superior. I would imagine it is a great place to be in the summer months. Duluth had seen some snowfall in the last few days. No more than a few inches though.

Further north we drove. Towns and civilization disappeared almost completely. Pine trees were all that could be seen. Millions and millions of them covered every scrap of land. I would have liked to get out of the car and enjoyed the silence for a while. When I get my own automobile in a few weeks I plan to do many things like that.

We arrived in Isabella around 18:00. Here is the lowdown on the town: a few houses and one building that encompasses a restaurant, bar, liquor store, gas station and a motel. Kind of like at home, you know, the pub/shop/funeral-home one stop shop.

We convened on Jason's place of work and location of his birthday party: the restaurant, bar, liquor store... It was plain that this was going to be one serious redneck night out. On the wall hung many a dead and stuffed animal. At the bar sat many the silent and drunken man. Not much talk going on between anyone. The country and western music played loudly. We were of interest to the entire establishment because of where we had come from, the big city. Even thought this place was small and not as fast paced as Minneapolis, or even Navan for that matter, it was packed with interesting people that told me some of the best stories ever. I talked to guys who had been in World War II. I talked to guys who had never heard of Ireland. I watched men in their 60's eat vodka jelly shots with tea spoons. I watched the entire town get hammered and enjoy life.

I was shown photos of some local guys and a moose they had shot and then cut up for meat. The head alone nearly took up the entire back of the pickup truck in the photo and the man who shot it told me he culled nearly 700lbs of meat from that one animal. I didn't take kindly to the picture he showed me of the black bears they had killed. If there is meat on it, it gets shot. Pretty basic stuff. Four legs bad, two legs good.

It was hard to get drunk with the amount of crazy stuff that was stimulating me. Yes, sweet sweet drunkenness eluded me but enabled me to take away plenty of memories.

We went back to Jason's house sometime after midnight. Some of the braver guests took off the majority of their clothes and partook in the age old tradition of "rolling in the snow". Maybe next year. It looked painful but also one of those things I wish I had of done. Regrets, I have a few.

Smoking

Three years ago today I stopped smoking. God I'm great. Here are the numbers:

12
Average number of cigarettes I used to smoke every day.

12 x 365 x 3 = 13,140
Number of cigarettes not smoked in the last three years.

100mm
Approximate length of one cigarette.

13,140 x 100mm = 1314m (nearly one mile)
Total length of cigarettes not smoked layed end to end.

Don't forget all the money that was saved, and subsequently wasted on other vices.

Mystery night

Friday night has become mystery night here. We pick a bar that none of us have ever been to before and then go there in search of new adventures. It usually works out quite well. We meet new people, sample new drinks, use new and strange bathrooms.

Last night we decided on a bar called The Starlite Lounge. We strolled in the door and took a right and landed in a room that had candle lit tables, nice comfortable seats, a projector beaming videos onto the wall and a cool dance floor with small lights embedded into it. The DJ was playing some Pet Shop Boys song, which was then followed by a George Michael song and then Elton John continued the theme. At this point we were the only people there. Some time later a group of four well dressed gentlemen arrived, and then a group of about six guys, then a guy on his own, then another bunch of lads. If my objective had been to try and meet some ladies then I was quite obviously in the wrong pub. Maybe an hour later, this guy walks in wearing only a pair of jeans. Nothing else at all. He jumped up on this pedestal thing that was literally 2ft away from us and started to dance. Then another guy (less clothes that the first dancer) jumped onto another pedestal and strutted his stuff. The table next to us had emptied their wallets of $1 bills and stacked them on the table. I gather they were going to use them in a strip club kind of way.

We felt more and more out of place as time went on. It's not that we were uncomfortable though, the drinks had helped out with any insecurity we might be feeling. We just couldn't stop laughing at the way the entire time we were there little things kept happening that made us stand out from everyone else. By the time we left it was entirely obvious to everyone that we did not know what kind of bar this was. Someone told me that the waiters were taking bets on when we would leave.

To make a long story short, it was a fantastic night and I look forward to what the next mystery night will bring.

Thanksgiving

Went to Waupaca, Wisconsin last Thursday for Thanksgiving weekend. Thanksgiving also marks the final days of the deer hunting season. As such the fields and woods were full of guys (and some ladies) with their guns. Although I have no problem with this pastime I was annoyed that the great outdoors were off limits to me. The highway that took us to Wisconsin was adorned on either side by deer that had been hit by cars. Some of them looked like they were simply asleep while others had been cut in half by bigger vehicles. The thought of free venison was always on my mind.

Thanksgiving is probably as big a holiday as Christmas. And because of this we were treated to a banquet. Martha's family went all out. The turkey was cooked on the barbeque and was absolute perfection. I learned that meals that look and taste great are not necessarily hard to accomplish. A kitchen timer is an invaluable tool to the chef. Which reminds me, I cooked my first ever ham a few weeks ago. I'm in the big leagues now.

Rain was ever present over the weekend and when coupled with the danger of death by gunshot it made for a lot of time spent indoors. We played Scrabble on Saturday night. I enjoyed my finest hour. On one turn I managed to mop up 56 points by only using one letter. Triple word scores and double letter scores played to my advantage. I lost the game soon after.

Now that I think of it, the weekend was a very athletic one. I played pool, Scrabble, I bowled and on Thursday afternoon I played horseshoes in the garden. Oh, and I did some driving, which is also a sport. All that makes for quite the pentathlon.

A few scoops

Went for a few last night. Good laugh. The bar we went to was near a factory that makes fortune cookies. Someone said that there is a notice on the front door of the building that says "Don't ask about employment". Apparently people keep going in and asking can they work as the person that writes the fortunes.

Skinner (SS) & Chalmers (SC)

SC - "Well Seymour, I made it, despite your directions."
SS - "I hope you're ready for mouth watering hamburgers!"
SC - "I thought we were having steamed clams?"
SS - "Oh no no, I said steamed hams. That's what I call hamburgers."
SC - "You call hamburgers steamed hams?"
SS - "Yes. It's a regional dialogue."
SC - "Uh...what region?"
SS - "Uuuh. Upstate New York."
SC - "Really? Well I'm from Ithaca and I've never heard anyone use the phrase steamed hams."
SS - "Oh not in Utica, no, it's an Albany expression."
SC - "Uh I see. You know these hamburgers are quite similar to the ones they have at Krusty Burgers."
SS - "Hohohoho. No. Patented Skinner Burgers. Old family recipie."
SC - "For...steamed hams."
SS - "Yes."
SC - "Yes, and you call them steamed hams despite the fact they are obviously grilled."
SS - "You know I...One thing I sh...Excuse me for one second. Well, that was wonderful. A good time was had by all. I'm pooped."
SC - "Yes, I should be...Good lord, what is happening in there?"
SS - "Aurora Borealis?"
SC - "Aurora Borealis? At this time of year? At this time of day? In this part of the country? Localized entirely within your kitchen?"
SS - "Yes."
SC - "May I see it?"
SS - "No."
SC - "Well, Seymour, you are an odd fellow, but I must say you steam a good ham."

How do you like them apples?

Went to the supermarket tonight. Me and Martha saw the deal of the century, a bag of apples for $1.59. Too good to be true? Yes. Grabbed two bags, ended up paying $14 for the them. Turns out the deal was priced per weight and the apples just happened to be in bags. They better be the best dam apples in America.

Tea

Drinking an aul cup of tay here. Jaysus, the stuff is hard to beat. I am used to the milk here now so it is no longer a cup of skanky shite that I am forced to drink. My taste buds have assimilated completely to local dairy products.

Nowt to report really. Made a website for my company, not exactly ground breaking stuff but it's a start and will be built upon. Have a look (LINK).

It's supposed to snow this week. I'd better rake the last of the leaves in the garden or else they will rot under the snow, until it melts, in April 2005. Seriously.

Pints

I had big plans for today. They involved building a bench that will allow me to launch my woodwork career. Didn't materialize. Instead I went for a few afternoon drinks. The second bar we went to was a VFW bar. That stands for Veterans of Foreign Wars. Early afternoon and the place was full of guys in their 60's and their wives. Tough men who could probably tell a tale or two. Everyone was wearing white socks and trucker hats. What the hell is with that?

Halloween

Halloween is pretty big here. Not as big as Christmas or Thanksgiving but it's definitely up there with Ash Wednesday and Pancake Tuesday. We were invited over to a friends house last night to carve pumpkins and have a laugh. I'd never done this before but it basically involves making an opening in the top and scooping the guts out of it. It's kind of similar to removing the contents of a person's head in some mad cult ritual. Most of the pumpkin brains can be put to use in recipes. We took the hundreds of seeds and roasted them in the oven. They kind of taste like popcorn. Beautiful.

Snippets

Instead of telling long narratives about the week that was, here are some things that I experienced this week.

I was in the Korean part of the city yesterday and saw a tailor's shop that had the following sign outside "extra short men's suits". I know where I'm going if I need a suit.

There was some crazy guy wandering the streets today. He asked some old lady could he have a hug, then he asked us why we didn't have $30m dollars. Only in America.

A guy got shot and killed only five blocks from our house last week. You can see bullet holes in the wall of a hotel nearby.

Ian McNulty used the funniest phrase ever in an email to me: "as busy as a Corinthian's letter box".

I read a nice quote that brought a few tears to my Irish eyes: "I returned to Ireland. Ireland green and chaste and foolish. And when I wandered over my own hills and talked again to my own people I looked into the heart of this life and saw that it was good". Patrick Kavanagh, The Green Fool. I have no desire to jump ship here yet but just thought that this was great writing.

Apple pie

Martha and Kelley are having their "First Annual Bake Off" right now. They each baked an apple pie and various friends are consuming the pies and rating them accordingly. There is heated rivalry between the two cooks and fear in those eating the pies. If they say they like one pie more than the other then there could be problems.

We had a good weekend. There was bowling on Saturday night, at the Stardust Lanes of course. Not as much fun as the first time I was there but I did manage to score 190 points in the first game. Kudos to me.

The weather is changing fast and it is hovering around 0°C at the moment. It can only get colder from now on. Bring on the snow.

Cooking

All my cooking life I have ignored the instructions on packets. The results have been true bachelor fare. I get lucky on occasion and produce a meal that is worthy of a king. Today I decided that I would reference one of Martha's many cookery books and have a go at making rice. The old approach was to lash a few fistfuls of the stuff into a pot and boil the shite out of it for 15 minutes. Oh how wrong I have been. By following the recipe today I produced rice that one would expect in a decent restaurant. Fair play to me.

In other news, the job is going great and I am learning loads. The commute is a bit of a headache but I hope to save up enough cash to buy a car or a donkey at least. The one good thing about bus riding is that it is guaranteed free time to read/write/listen to music/plot certain deeds, etc.

I made up a joke today, possibly insensitive but I'll take my chances. Here goes. Did you hear about Superman dying? Yeah, apparently it was Kryptonite related. Ha ha ha.

Christopher Walken

Me, Kelley and her brother Michael went to Nye's bar last night in northeast Minneapolis. Nye's is probably one of the best places in the world. It is decorated like a semi-classy 1970's Vegas lounge. We're talking plastic gold glitter seating and the like. In the main room there is a piano and the resident player will play along to whatever a random patron wants to sing. There was lots of Sinatra sung last night. One man had the voice of an angel and made "Fly me to the moon" a work of art. Before we went out Michael barbequed the best steak I have ever had. He used the "Butterfly" technique. Patent pending on that. Secrecy will not allow me to divulge any more on this matter.

The back room of Nye's is where the Polka band play and the same band have been playing there every weekend for close to 40 years. The oldest band member is about 75 years old. About two years ago she was carried out half way through a set because she collapsed from a stroke. But, thanks to medical technology she made a near complete recovery and is back playing Polka music every Friday night. Last night we noticed that the drummer had been replaced for some reason. This guy was the reason we go to Nye's. Why? Because, he wears a wig that looks exactly like Christopher Walken's hair. Not joking. We are convinced that he had the thing custom made. We asked the waitress where Mr.Walken had gone. Well, it went like this.

Kelley: Where's the old drummer gone?
Waitress: Oh, they had to get rid of him, he couldn't keep a beat.

How could they do this to us? Not to worry though, his memory will live on in our hearts and more importantly on the t-shirts that Kelley sourced with his mug on the front.

That's why I love being here. Really cool stuff happens all the time.

Goodbye Ireland

I traveled back to America yesterday. On previous trips to the US I had been very nervous going through immigration in Dublin airport. With good reason too. This time though, I had a visa and had jumped all the hurdles that the worlds only superpower had put in my path. Kevin 1, America 0.

The peace of mind of having the visa gave me the reassurance that one would get from owning about 10 bunches of rosary beads. I am not a religious man but I know the beads give comfort to those who own and use them.

I was all psyched up for another grilling by the immigration officers and possibly a date with a surgical glove followed by rejection of my attempts to enter this fine country. But, the entire day including events outside the airport was fantastic.

I awoke early and messed around the house for a while. I spent some quality time with the dog, who is in his autumn years and I know his days on earth are numbered. Saddening really. Not sad for him though, because dogs are eternally optimistic and probably don't have the need or ability to look into the future and become depressed at their fate. They live in the present.

Soon after paying my respects to the dog I talked with my grandmother for a while. I came away knowing great things about deceased relatives and other knowledge that brightened up my day.

After checking in my luggage at the airport I decided that my hungry stomach needed to be filled. In an attempt to burn up my remaining currency I decided upon a somewhat fancy meal. No point eating McDonalds or some other dirt as I am about to leave the homeland for a considerable period of time. I was on a mission for spuds and meat.

I made a quick tour of the restaurants and settled on what I believe is the restaurant that has been there for at least 15 years, well, it is definitely older and more established that the other places anyway. The menu looked great. I went for the shank of lamb with new potatoes and carrots. Real food. I was just picking up my tray to go and find a place to sit when a man in his late 60's asked if I could help him. He wanted me to carry his tray to a table. I had two options.

1. Be a prick and say "I don't actually work here mister, do it yourself".
2. Help the man out.

I went for option two. He was a bit confused by the whole setup so I carried his stuff over to the cashier and we got sorted out. I noted that he was having the exact same food as me. Great minds think alike. We exchanged names, places of birth and purpose of visit to Dublin airport. He was heading off to Fatima in Portugal in hope of seeing the Blessed Virgin Mary. He was extremely religious and told me that most of his holidays are spent going to places like Fatima, Lourdes and other holy sites. We made small talk about the quality of the lamb we were furiously eating. It was very high and as the meal vanished more and more I realized that €12 had been a fair asking price for both the quantity and quality of what we had been given. I'd sell my soul for another lump of lamb like that. I began to think that the man had dedicated so much of his mind to religious matters that he had become a little out of touch with the workings of the country and systems such as air travel. His flight was to depart at 18:10 yet here we were sitting together at 12:30. And, he said that he had already been over to the airport church for a mass earlier. Many more weird things happened but if I was to explain them in detail it might look like I am making fun of the man. Not true. I thought he was a nice guy and he said that he would say a prayer for me.

I think that prayer may have paid off because my treatment in the immigration department was none other that enjoyable and worry free. The guy even cracked a few jokes and as I took my stamped visa from him he said "hope it all goes great for you, pal."

Pretty good start to the adventure if you ask me.

Big step

My fortunes in life have improved of late, and about time too. I got my US work visa and am now able to live and work there for the next 18 months. That is the best news of the year so far. I am looking forward to getting back to my life in Minneapolis. I am really enthusiastic about the autumn, or the “Fall” as they call it. Makes sense to me, leaves “fall” off trees, and so on and so forth. I have often poked fun at American phraseology only to have the smile wiped off my face when the logic of the phrase is explained to me. They’re not thick so they’re not. I am also excited about trying my hand at a few winter sports this time, aside from shoveling snow from the path in front of our apartment. The immediate Dunne family is coming over for Christmas. That will be a good time.

In other news. I went to Galway last weekend to see a friend. A great city. It’s the best place in the world when the sun is beating down. I even helped fly a kite. How does one help fly a kite? One just does, end of story.

I got the face sun burnt off me today. Not a pleasant feeling. I'll live though. I went to a free outdoor concert in the Phoenix Park today. There were 100,000 people in attendance. Here are the famous people that I saw:

1. The guy who played Eoin McLove in Father Ted.
2. The guy who won Ireland’s only Olympic gold medal in Athens.
3. Keith Duffy of ex-Boyzone and current Coronation Street fame.

Soaked old man

The weekly installment of drunken tales from the weekend. What an empty life I lead! This time it was a three day event. It's probably boring to read so I will just say that Friday involved watching the Olympics in the Pines, women's indoor volleyball was the sport in question... and what a sport it is. Better not say any more or I'll get dumped. Saturday, bike riding for the afternoon.

Mr. X paid a visit to our nations capital on Saturday night. One of the funniest things that happened was when Mr. X milled into a puddle at a bus stop and drenched an old geezer.

Dublin ain't so bad

Not a bad weekend was had. Friday night was excellent. Went for dinner and beer with a few fellas from work. The funniest night I've had in a long time. Dublin is really enjoyable these days. And, there is plenty of room in pubs due to about 200 patrons standing outside every pub smoking fags. They seem to be happy to spend the whole night out there and only come in to refuel. But we all know that the real essence of a pub is within the four internal walls.

Cycled into town and also cycled home, after about seven pints. The courage and the speed with which I navigated the beast was incredible. One of the lads had his bike stolen. Nicht gut.

Tried to come up with some new ideas for another website. Here is a hot tip for anyone who knows something about Father Ted, and wants to stab me in the back; www.patmustard.com is an available domain name.

The Gods

The Gods were good to me today. A number of reasons make this so:

1. After having a shower I went into my room and was looking for a clean t-shirt. I stuck my left arm into the wardrobe, and rummaged around. I grabbed what I thought was an old Nike t-shirt. Not so, I unfolded it and what did I find but a brand new Homer Simpson t-shirt that I never knew I owned. Really, where did this come from? There is no-one here to ask at the moment so I can only assume that it is a gift from above.

2. Earlier this evening I went for a bike ride and brought my digital camera. It was pretty awkward trying to ride the bike and take photos all the while dodging cars and people. So, I had a revelation/vision of some sort of attachment for the handle bars that would allow me to screw the camera onto the bike and then be virtually hands free. I might drop up to work on Saturday and manufacture this mad attachment.

County Hell

I went to Nenagh, County Tipperary this weekend. Went to visit a friend who is absolutely paranoid about his name being used on the internet. He wanted to be referred to as Mr. X. I will obey your wishes for anonymity Mr. X.

Did the usual stuff in Dublin on Friday and Saturday and then hit the road for Nenagh early on Sunday. Nice bus journey. A bit long though. Kind of wish I had a car, then again, don't really care. Arrived in Nenagh at 15:00. Mr. X didn't arrive on the scene for about 30 minutes because he was asleep, the bum. We then went to see his new house. Very nice. A man could do well there. I had a beer and then we went to the parents of Mr. X. As usual there was a massive meal. Every time I go there I fall for the same trick, eat loads but forget that I have to drink later, meanwhile the food is somehow reducing my beer capacity. I think they do it on purpose. So we finished dinner and helped out by washing the dishes... no we didn't... we just left and went to Dromineer Harbor on the river Shannon. We befriended a really smart dog and then watched some fool sail a 30ft rented yacht into about 2ft of water. There was a big family on board and the kids thought this was hilarious. It was funny, in a kind of lose-your-€500-security-deposit-on-a-boat-kind-of-way. We had some ice-cream and hit the road.

Niall came around to the house and we watched a few episodes of the Sopranos. Soon after it was off to the pub. Enjoyable. Then later, we went to the worlds smelliest night club. 16 year old lads drinking whiskey, fights, madness. Wilder than anything you'd ever see in America. These are the things I miss, the wild social life. It got hazy from here and I woke up the next day at high noon. There is some other stuff that happened, but I am scanning through a potential list of people who would be offended and there are a few candidates, so I will leave that story for another day.

Next day was Monday. I pressured Mr. X into getting his hole off the couch and out into the stix. It was great. We went out by Silvermines and up the mountains. Mr. X decided to pull out the golf clubs and drive a few balls off the top of the mountain.

Nice swing X. We drove on and found ourselves in serious banjo country. We actually got lost and I loved it. Big cities are really starting to crush my soul, and so this opportunity to get some peace and quiet and fresh air was relished. Some day...

Germany

I returned to Ireland nearly three weeks ago. It is nice to be home. Things have been quite busy due to applying for a work visa and going on a holiday to Germany for one week. Let's hear about Germany so. My friend Mark has lived there for three years and because I had not visited since 2001 I thought I would see how Germany (and Mark) are doing. Both are doing pretty good. Germany has massive unemployment and various other problems, but none of this is evident due to the niceness and positivity (or maybe the carefree outlook) of everyone I met. Mark does not like his details to be shared on the internet so all I can say is that he is still alive and is happy. I've probably said too much.

I was in Hamburg for the entire week except for one overnight stay in Berlin, which is not worth talking about because Berlin did nothing for me. Hamburg is great. It has lakes, parks, nice buildings, an amazing transport system, the ocean, stuff is extremely cheap, there are bike paths all over the city, some pubs that stay open till 6am... and the people are really nice. What more could you want?

I arrived on Tuesday and Mark had to work all week so I amused myself around town and by rooting through his stuff when he wasn't there. You learn so much about a person by the things they hide from the world. Of course, I am only joking... or am I? Nice city, nice walks. On Friday we were reunited in booze and a whale of a time was had. Apparently we went to four pubs but, alas, I only remember being in two of these establishments. Did we drink too much? Possibly, but some amount of craic was had. The amount of fun that one has is directly related to the amount of booze taken on board. A simple equation governs that ago old law.

I begin work at my former Irish employer on Monday and am very happy about that. There is plenty of work to be done and I need to exercise my brain after bombarding it with beer molecules for the last few months.

Heading home

The American dream ends on Tuesday with my return to the old country. Hopefully I can take up where I left off upon return in October. Great time was had here. Tons of opportunities and I am looking forward to having a stab at the true dream. All sounds pretty vague, right?

Bowling

Time is flying by. I'll be back home in less than three weeks. T'will be good to be home for a while but I am now sure that America is where I want to be. Various reasons, the most important one being that I wake up happy everyday here and am amused & amazed by trivial things that happen all around me. There are things that I miss from home though, this weeks' most missed thing is the metric system. These ounces, pounds, fractions of inches are complete horseshit but you just have to deal with it.

Me, Martha, Kelley and a few others got seriously hammered last night at a local bowling alley, "The Stardust Lanes". It's in a dodgy neighborhood and last year there were three people shot dead outside the place. As such, there were two armed cops there all night, just hanging out and keeping an eye on shit or protecting and serving as they say. The funny part is that they were smoking the fattest cigars I have seen in a long time. Sure why not? The place was built in the 70's and stays true to that era. The music was amazing all night, funk, soul, hip hop, jazz. The place oozes personality. Me, Martha and Kelley drank five pitchers between us. The bowling stared off well, but slowly descended into a situation where I was terrified to bowl, due to two incidents. The first involved me nearly knee capping myself. I went to bowl and as I released the ball it slammed into my knee and I was left sprawled on the floor and making a clown out of myself. I laughed and so did another forty or fifty people. They'll pay dearly for that behavior. A few minutes later I grabbed a ball with small holes and when I threw it, it stuck on my hand but then released and reached an altitude of about ten feet in the air. It came crashing down and all eyes were on me again. After this I didn't want to bowl anymore because who knows what the hell would happen next? More bowling wasn't an option anyway, because due to our drunk and carefree state, our lane got given to some other people in a moment of mass confusion. Screw it. We hung out some more and then left. A terrific night. One of the best in a long time actually. When you combine booze with a hobby or pastime, like bowling, it makes the whole experience more enjoyable. Fact.

There was a massive thunder and lightning storm today. We cycled around and looked at it from a distance. The lightning was exciting. Weather is crazy at the moment. Hot as shit, then inches of rain can fall in half an hour, then thunder. What the hell?

Wisconsin

The sun is out, for the first time in days. Monsoon season at the moment. Heading to Waupaca, Wisconsin tomorrow morning. Camping is the agenda for the weekend. Martha's folks have land in Wisconsin and it is there that tents will be pitched and beer drank. Martha got a bike rack so we can bring our bikes there and do some exploring, solving mysteries and the like. Everything else is going extremely well and there is nowt worth complaining about.

A brand new bike

I'm thinkin' of buying me a chair. Somethin' fancy and modern. The purchase of a chair isn't to be taken lightly though. I am slowly acquiring stuff for my "office". I am hoping that I can do some work from home, paperwork and the like.

Bought a bike two weeks ago. Cycling all over the place now. Thought I would die of a heart attack but actually surprised by my level of cardiac fitness. Lots of scenic bike routes here by the river and all that.

I turned 25 on Friday. Frightening stuff. Very nice birthday though. Dinner and chocolate cake was had. I wasn't in a pub this weekend. That's probably the first dry weekend since I was about 15, seriously.

Raining for the last few days. What's that all about? Kinda like it though. Feels like home!

Milwaukee

A trip to Milwaukee was made this Saturday to witness the graduation of Martha’s brother from university. Many family members were there. T’was great to see them all again. Before setting out for Milwaukee on Saturday we hung around in Minneapolis for a few hours and pursued our favorite past time – rummage sales. If you want bargains then the rummage sale is the home of the bargain. I got some brand new books that originally cost $40 but were sold to me for 25c. I could go on and list the deals we got but the list is too long. The apartment is filling up quick with “stuff”.

Milwaukee was fantastic as always. Two straight nights in The Roman Coin (sleazy war veteran’s bar). The booze is cheap and the customers are insane. They show violent movies on three TV’s, just to keep the blood boiled up to a healthy/angry level. We managed to persuade the barman to switch one of the TV’s over so that we could watch COPS.

A crack head came into the bar and hustled me out of $10. I fell for his sob story (he had just moved up from Louisiana, baby had a brain tumor, couldn't find a job, stole food to feed family, was thrown in jail even though he was innocent…) He was dam good. The fact that it was a scam was proven by a customer in the bar telling me that the guy had been fired recently from a restaurant for stealing lobsters, and had lived in Milwaukee, not Louisiana, all his life. He tapped into my charity vein, which many believe does not exist.

Tornado

All is going great. Weather is beautiful. Survived my first tornado yesterday. It was pretty scary and we had to hide out in the basement for a while. No Wizard of Oz stuff happened though. Pity. We are heading to Milwaukee next Saturday for the weekend. Great city. I expect to have many, many a laugh.

Sports

Went to a Baseball game last night. Not quite as dramatic as on TV and a million times less exciting as a game of Hurling, but still there was a good atmosphere and the hot dogs were top notch. Some woman sitting beside us even brought work along with her. She had a stack of documents and was busily highlighting shit and writing things. The stadium was fully enclosed and was cool. Not a lot happens during the game and it ends without any fanfare or climax at all. Strange.

This Friday will see me and Kelley make a trip to the Leinenkugels Brewery in Chippewa Falls, Wisconsin. Leinenkugels is what we drink here.

Tricks

This is something that obsessed me for a long time, didn't really go anywhere, then got forgotten about. Although the method is not very hi-tech, the results can be quite interesting. Whatever. Fuck off.

On the dole, kind of

Unemployment is going great. This is made sure by knowing that I have a few shekels in the bank. If that dries up before I get a job then unemployment will not be as appealing as it currently is. "Unemployment" as a friend of mine says "is not for everyone". We'll see about that.

They say that these personal websites are so 1990's but putting shit up on the web is a lot easier than sending loads of emails or making phone calls. That's my view on the matter.